Morning

I'm having my first cup of coffee in this empty house, trying hard to remember what it means to be sad........

Something like that. I heard a line like that and it's sticking with me. Kind of like a song that sticks with you for the rest of the day. It's been Michael Jackson songs for these last 3 weeks. Gotta love nostalgia.

Things are pretty good. Work is steady and crazy as usual. Home life is good. Service is excellent. My moods aren't too bad, either. Jason's dad will come down in 2 weeks to paint my living room and bedroom. It's hard to believe we've been in this house for over 19 months. It doesn't feel that long. We've really made it our own.

Jason's first public talk is this weekend. I am so nervous for him, but I don't know why. He has such a knack for public speaking. Me, on the other hand, not so much. It's been all he can think about. Once it is over, we can both breathe easy.


I looked up the serial in my 1.00 Coach bag only to reassure myself that it is a fake. The 1.00 Louis Vuitton wallet, on the other hand, I believe that is real.

Rubbin my tired eyes.

Nothing completes a 10 hour work day like cleaning the house and doing laundry. My knees and back ached at about 10 pm as a waited for Jason to come home from his work function at Ember last night. I watched a little Nancy Grace. listened to a little digital radio.

I found a great resale shop in Maitland. Designer Seconds has a nice variety of higher end clothing items. I bought a nice Ann Taylor Loft shirt to go with my black and white skirt for 6 dollars and a nearly new Lacoste shirt for 7. Christina and I will definitely check it out when she comes to town.

Thinking of going to visit her in October or November. Have to see what is going on in the autumn months. Just think, a couple of months and it will actually get cooler. I am dreaming of it:)

Perception

"When the doors of perception are cleansed, everything will appear to man as it truly is: infinite." -- William Blake

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." Anais Nin

I've been extemely sad for the last week. Certain people have perceived certain untrue things about me. It is hard to understand why. Instead of just coming to me, they just propagate the very untrue perception of me. Jason has been great at defending me. It has helped a lot. It has also been a humbling experience. It helps me to see what I could personally do to improve myself and also to not take myself too seriously. This has been a challenge.

Sigh......

How is it so that certain family members can get under your skin? I ask myself this after this passing weekend. It wasn't a totally bad experience, but I would not want to relive it. I was glad I was able to spend some time with Lindsey. It is always nice to go to Ikea, even if I wan dying to leave a little earlier.

Didn't go to pioneer school. I was slightly disappointed but will save the joy for next summer. I think my work was happy that I didn't have to miss work. They were disappointed for me, but they would miss my smiling face:) I am so sure.

It is good to get life back to normal. I actually have 3 regular studies this week. I am glad to have a refuge from the heat of the summer.

Tableaux

I am looking for love at first sight, which I know is out there'

I just watched a great documentary on Picasso and Matisse. I had no idea they were such great friends. It is a coincidence that Henri Matisse's grandson lives in Ormond. He is also an artist. A friend of mine helps him sell his art work. According to Jourdan, he really is riding on the whole "I'm related to Matisse" thing. I would love to get one of his pieces. If I ever have 500 to 1000 dollars that I don't need, I will jump right on it.

The in-laws will be in this weekend. That is why I am taking the day as a mental health day. I am still not sure if I will be going to pioneer school next week. No one has confirmed anything with me yet. I am assuming that it is all a go. If not, I think I'll be helping out more at work.

We have a new doctor at work. She is really nice and is a real change for our clinic. Dr. Mck has been running the show by himself for the last 2 years. We've all been players in this three-ringed circus. It's just a nice way to say that he likes to multi-task.

I spent a lot of time cleaning the house yesterday. I got the carpet cleaner from work and slaved to move furniture and dust everything. All the laundry is done. Sure enough, at 4 am, one of my cats is puking on my freshly cleaned, white carpet. I didn't know cats were nauseated by the smell of Woolite. So, out came the carpet cleaner this morning.

I love my new kitten. He is so playful and happy. I now a household of cats who don't think that they are cats. Bronx thinks he is a king. Harlem thinks he's retarded, and Bernie thinks he's a dog. I sometimes wish I had normal cats. What is a wish?

I think I am going to see either my brother or my sister in the next couple of months. I feel bad that they both live 4 hours away and I haven't taken the time to go and visit. So the question is: Do I want to visit Southern mansions, or eat cubans on the beach? The operative question is still this: Savannah or Miami? Depends on how pretentious I am feeling.........

I have a feeling that the next 2 months are going to be hectic. Pioneer school, Jason's first talk, convention. I probably won't be able to think about visiting until the end of September. Jason talked to Garth in Bulgaria. That is still an option. Plus, my sister can get me a mad discount for W hotels. $29/night for family. Is there a W in Paris and Bulgaria? We'll have to make two stops.